i miss you

You've managed to cling onto my mind and I can't seem to shake you. It's been almost 4 months since we've separated and I still think about you everyday. Maybe not as much and not in the ways that I used to, but I still do.

Every morning without fail I wake up and I see you in my mind. You're lying next to me, smiling at me, reminding me of different times. Every morning without fail I stay in bed, letting the time pass, all the while holding on to this memory of you.

The thing is...

I don't want to think about you.

I don't want you to know that I think about you.

I don't want you to know that you've affected me in anyway.

That you've made me a better person and a worse one at the same time.

I don't want you to know that you made me happy.

Or that I cried so much because of you.

I don't want you to know that I loved you.

And that I blame myself for everything.

That I hate myself.

and that I miss you.

I'm moving on and I know I'll find someone better.

But for now, stay the fuck out of my mind you fucking bitch.